Thursday, November 29, 2007
they were once the most popular boy band in Hong Kong n Asia. but after the singer(elder brother) died while dealing with the ligh bulb before their concert, he falled! After that his younger brother(black shirt playing guitar) take over him. from den.. this boy band falls. but they are still producing their album. this is one of the song that i like when i heard it in Malaysia. Heard this story of both brother too. feel sad for them. from then, den i noe they are called BEYOND !
YYY
im lOving iiu .
10:49 PM
saw this "story" from a friend's friendster. den find it quite meaningful so decide to post it out.
Once,
People asked me,
How long is an eternity?
I told'em,
To some people,
Eternity last for 1000 years,
For few,
It last for a million years.
But he wanted 10000 years,
To hold his girlfriend,
To love her,
To tease her,
To give her everything he could,
And i agree...But..
To me,
An eternity...
Only last for a lifetime,
I don't live that long,
As long as i know i could love her til my very last breath.
I'm contented.
As long as i could give her my very best in life,
I'm contented.
As long as i could see her smile everyday,
I'm contented.
To love,
Is not just about what you can give or what you can received.
To me,
Love is about compromising,
Understanding each other,
Forgiving and FORGET.
Definitely,
Some things are easier said then done..
Time will tell..
But how long will it takes?
An eternity?
.
.
.
.
.
Yet again,
If you can add a life span to your relationship,
How long would you want it to last?
.
.
.
.
.
Hope i can hold you,
For an eternity of happiness,
I give you my everything.
After reading how do eu feel?
YYY
im lOving iiu .
10:14 PM
Monday, November 19, 2007
noeing that yesterday eu play the whole day at ur friend house not sleeping early makes me angry at first. but the next moment my heart started to tear. it ache! makes me so pain. knowing eu cant sleep enuff. noeing eu are tired. noeing eu cant have sufficient sleep but im still sleeping so soundly. makes my heart pain alOtts... ... ... it hurts eu noe... ... =((
*________ 我爱你 不需再怀疑 你就是我寻找的唯一 ________*
YYY
im lOving iiu .
11:46 PM
suddenly think of the past. the first time eu saw me is when im on the stage for the first time singing to one thousand people in that revealing clothes which i never dare to wear in streets before, singing that song ma de li bu si yi.
At that moment, when eu first saw me, whats ur reaction?
have it ever strike ur mind, this gal gonna be the gal i love in future?
have it ever strike ur mind, can i noe this gal?
have it ever strike ur mind, ill mark this gal as my lifetime partner?
For the second time eu saw me oso the first time i see eu, in FLP office.
izzit fate that let you meet me again?
izzit fate that brings me there to take a look at eu when shaking hands?
izzit fate that let me find eu attractive the first time i saw eu?
izzit fate that wants us to be success in Forever and stand on stage to speak together?
From there our storys start as friend.. whats my first impression i have given eu? my first impression for eu? hahaas. dao! den slowly find out eu are handsome. nice smile. cute pattern. funny. jokes around. friendly. kept teasing me n xiao wei. at first i tot eu like her. cuss always sees eu bullying her, den got a weird feeling. always trying to avoid the scene that eu tease her den always make a move first. Secretly like eu behind until a shock news from xw that eu n her got together le. was like lost of words but building a strong smile too. but its lucky i haven fall deeply yet. but after sometime eu two went apart. saw eu so sad n down in the MRT. so much wanted to console eu.. but scared too.. cuss i noe i dun have the zhi ge to console eu either. Until half way thru the training i saw ur teeth! eu are finally smiling n laughing! that brings me a sign; phew~ eu are finally smiling! but... still dun dare to talk to eu. only dare to see eu at the back. [ ur backview is nice eh =) ]
Den one day a friend kinda message reach ur handphone that is from me. That's when our lOvelife start!
i thank you for not letting me to noe eu earlier. But why let me wait so long for eu lehhs? Am i so hard to find? Lols. indeed i am! Eu too! =))
if there's a choice to choose whether i wanna go for the trip. i will surely say NO! but if he's coming alOng. i will nod my head hardly n shout YES! will be looking forward toO! but haiis. i cant choose... how am i going to go on for this week without receiving any of his sms or calls? how long will this week be over? i miss euu ... ... ... ... =((
Some things are not meant to say out, but actions shows.
YYY
im lOving iiu .
11:16 PM
世界唯一的你
*________ it holds a big meaning for both of us ________ *
*________ it holds a big meaning for both of us ________ *
YYY
im lOving iiu .
1:10 PM
Sunday, November 18, 2007
for ahh bann
i wont be by ur side to comfort eu
i wont be by ur side when you need me
i cant be there to share ur sad n happiness challenges
eu cant find me if eu need me badly
all because im away!! =((
bear for this one week kaees! without me, eu and Jian Liang have longer time together lehhs. lOls. Joking lahhs. if he makes you angry or hurts, dun be too sad kaees. im living in ur heart! No matter where eu go, must bring ur brightest smile with me along kaees!
In AAI, remember, eu are the best! Let ur downlines feel proud of eu! Let them noe eu are coming here to do business not to play! JiayoOus! I may be unable to be by ur side so much anymore as my mama wants me to quit Forever le. she says everytime i have been coming home late. Weekends also need to do Forever. den she ask me to just quit it le!
When eu miss me just do something busy kaees. =))
YYY
im lOving iiu .
8:24 PM
i love the day we spent our time at Bbq. Although there is 1 or 2 lightbulb but im still glad eu are beside me. From our journey at Forever to Chinatown we had our porridge den went to take bus to West Coast, On the way there, eu ask me, what's the meaning of ' if eu get there before i do, dun give up on me!' i explained it to eu. when eu noe the meaning, eu sang that phrase to me. Thanks alOtts! It's really Nice! it's true! I feel so loved and happy when i heard eu singing it to me. =)
On the bus there, Jian Liang turn on his handphone Mp3. This lyrics coming from this songs called 心肝宝贝 strikes me.
因为你 让我明白生命的真谛
可知道 你的不小心 会让我伤心一辈子
为我 你要好好自己保护自己
为我 你要好好自己保重身体
在每一段的路 总会一身污泥心肝宝贝
不要怀疑 最爱的就是你
你是我一生的唯一
(ps: got abit of the lyrics i cut le cuss this is the only phrase i wanted to tell eu)
maybe cuss im leaving soon. with eu holding on to me and the song playing on, makes me feel so 舍不得!
At West Coast, During our playing time. Lols. you looks so much like a small boy. no bad intention ah! ur reaction is cute lahhs, i can say. Jian Liang say it too! somehow feels, eu are needed to be protected too. =p
Watching the sunset, although the 2nd time is not as beautiful as the 1st time, but as long as im watching with eu, how the sky looks like, is still beautiful for me. What i love most is when eu are feeding me with the dessert, and im teasing you and feeding eu too. The feeling is so sweet. =) At that moment, makes me feel that both of us are equal. What I mean as equal? means, eu r my laopo, im ur laogong lohhs. we take turns to care for each other. Although im miserable at that moment but with ur smile and care towards me makes me recovered fast. During our photo time, i love it too! Especially when Kok Soon ask eu if eu mind he put his hand on your shoulder, den i dunno where my courage come from. i put my arms around ur shoulders and answered him back, ' i mind!'. i feel like a guy protecting you again! =p Lols.
eu told me to gave you a chance to change. eu told me our relationship will have a new start. eu told me eu wanna treat me and care for me even better than last time. eu told me eu will do ur best to make our love life a totally new experience, one i would nv have expected coming from eu, one which will make me unforgetable! eu told me eu wan to make me the most happiest woman in this world. eu told me eu wan to be the person to care for me the most. eu told me eu will be a tall pillar which i can always depend on. eu told me to see your changes. Yes! im watching !! =D
YYY
im lOving iiu .
1:59 AM
by the time eu guys view my post.. i shud have left Malaysia le. =)) Im leaving for Malaysia for a week. Gonna Miss HIM n HER !!! i knew after Bbq that night wont be seeing eu le.. but still build a xi wang in myself, no matter wad, sure will get to see eu de. even for 1 minute is oso enuff. but im scared after seeing eu, i will dun bear to leave again. I Miss Eu la0og0ng!!! I promise Mr Pig! if anything happen in Malaysia, ill write down! if possible, ill give eu a call! Gonna miss ur voice!! =((
For Mr Pig
when im away, take good care of urself.
when im away, have your meals regularly. ( not instant noodles ah)
when im away, have limit on wad you are spending.
when im away, dun feel bored!
when im away, sleep early. ( not later den 1 am)
when im away, dun play games till forget eu must have 8 hours of sleep.
when im away, continue your missed call for me even though i cant received.
when im away, looked at the photo's in your wallet if eu miss me.
lying in your arms, makes me feel so protected. im just like your princess and you are my prince. lying under ur jaws, head tube up, secretly slowly looking at your eye brown, eyes, spectacle, nose, lips, mustache makes me have a thinking, " This is the guy I had chosen! This is the guy I wanna spend my rest of my life with, This is the guy I love !"
No guys care so much for me, but eu did!
No guys have given me surprise unknowingly, but eu did!
No guys wait for the time right to sing birthday song to me, but eu did!
No guys would send me home just to send me home, but eu did! (eg: if im at Somerset or Little India, no matter where eu are, if eu are free, eu would make a point to send me home safely)
No guys understand me so much, but eu did!
No guys noticed my clothings so much and give comments, but eu did!
No guys told me how they feel towards me for all occasions, but eu did!
No guys had talk to my dad so reasonable, but eu did! (at that moment, my mind flash " He's the right guy to stand beside me!")
No guys had makes my mum speak with laughter, but eu did!
No guys had makes my brother's so irritating, but eu did!
No guys cares whther my sister face is black anot, but eu did!
No guys cares whether did i take my meals regularly, but eu did!
No guys worrys where I go, but eu did!
No guys chat on fone with me for so long, but eu did!
No guys influence his feeling so much to me, but eu did!
No guys let me feel protected, but eu did!
No guys makes me feel im their princess, but eu did!
No guys makes me feel im important to them, but eu did!
No guys told me im the only one that can lie on their shoulders forever, but eu did!
Why eu did it? All because You love me, you treasure me, you need me. Im apart of ur life!
but... ... ...
I HATE YOU!! cuss... ...
eu came into my life without my permission,
eu steal my heart secretly,
eu make me shed tears for eu,
eu hurts me so much,
eu makes me feel ur computer is more important,
eu take me for granted once before,
eu are a bad listener sometimes,
eu influence my happy n sad times,
eu makes me feel insecure sometimes,
sometimes i cant feel ur love
but... ...
the more i HATE, the more i LOVE (x 100) eu!
Eu have become apart of my life! And I need you! I treasure you! I lOve you!
please dun ever think of wanting me to ditch eu when eu hurts me! Cuss i did promise eu before, i wont be leaving eu no matter wad. i will love eu more each day! and remember our first rule? that's the spirit that bring me up when eu hurts me. eu noe wad? sometime when you hurts me unknowingly, lying in ur arms helps me recover everything le. ur arms and hugs is my 'first aid!' =))
I admit im still worried between eu n her. but the 'ken din' eu gave me in the bus on Saturday(on the way to my gum n eu are on the way to office), im relieved le! the worrys in me had gone too! the words eu whisper in my ears, im not going to forget. The breathe of urs that touches my ears so softly, the tone of yours that is so sweet n soft, im not gonna forget! if someday, my worrys is back, i will tell eu as i promise eu but at the same time i will tell myself not to have those negative thoughts! =DD
*_ 我爱你 _*
eu are the reason for my smillee ___________________*
YYY
im lOving iiu .
1:07 AM
Friday, November 16, 2007
just like the song that is playing now. no matter how hard our relationship will be.. no matter how sweet it will be.. as long as im not scared.. as long as i did not regret choosing eu.. as long as eu are are beside me... it will be a strength for me to pull thru le...
_ i love eu _ <3
YYY
im lOving iiu .
2:41 AM
why izzit me? why am i always hurting people? why am i always doing the wrong things? why am i not understanding? why cant i seal my mouth? why cant i just open my heart? why cant i just believe him easily like wad i did previously? why am i always making things worst? why every problem starts from me? why is there a ME in this world? can some one please kill me? Can eu just stab me from behind thru my heart and let me die at one shot? can i be a evil gal? can everyone HATE me more? can ???
im tired in holding on to the ships... .... i exhuasted le... ... ... can i have some rest? please.. i need ur shoulder badly now... can i lie on it? just for a minute will do.. really... after one minute ill return ur shoulder to eu.. i promise!!
YYY
im lOving iiu .
1:59 AM
today have been busy organising xiao wei's party. Hope everything goes well! really scared there will be problem. kept running here and there to make the time right. Makes me feel like fainting. but still build a strong face in front of everyone. many times running here n there makes me giddy. noe why? cuss whole day i just ate 2 chocolate bread den busy planning things le.
kind of regret cooking those stuff in my house. cuss cleaning is done by me only. have learn a lesson for volunteering to cook at home den make myself busy n smelly only.
Anyway, its FUN toO! see her smillee is enuff le.. but too bad.. no tears lahhs.
saw her.. but too gan ga. dunno wad to talk to her about. den was like avoiding her too. but after she left.. was kind of regret.. why cant i just talk to her openly? there's still a guilty feeling in me...
saw him too... behind my block. i noe why he was here. i now why he was sad. i noe why he wear that shirt. i noe why he print that number on his shirt. its all because of ME!!! but i cant do anything too. all i can say is Im sorry!
wad's happening here? why is it everything seems to be my fault? why am i always giving in? why am i always keeping quiet and fight for my right? why am i so stupid? why am i so careless? why did my mood change easily? why am i so evil? why am i so bad? Arghhs~ Just HATE me for all eu wan!!! I DUN CARE ANYMORE!!!
i need space to breathe! i really need some space. i feel so miserable! feel im dying soon... even if i died.. please let me die peacefully....
Arghhs~ Wads gone into me?!!!! forget it!!! im Crazy already!!! Eu just wont understand! Eu toO!!! dun ask me anything. just give me time... I NEED TIME !!!
im tired... ... im exhuasted... ... its doesnt feel good in everything... it doesnt feel good at all...
someone please send me to woodbridge... wahahahahas. Joking de lahhs. lOls. =DD
Smille everyone!! I lOve eu Guys!!! Especially HIM n HER !!!!
YYY
im lOving iiu .
1:08 AM
将温柔紧紧的贴在我唇边
压着那蓝色的唇线
你的吻好浪漫
遮住了我视线
我爱那铺天盖地的甜言
还有些刺激的永远
缠绵排山倒海
爱你 就是我最大心愿
爱情象沙尘暴 猛扑向了我
我有一些不知所措
又紧张又兴奋 试着去体验
刹那间 就被它捕获
不管不顾一切
是恋人的本色
哭 闹再接着拥抱
你的脸紧紧的贴着我的脸
象有电把我心打乱
我的呼吸变困难
很漫长的时间
我爱那密不透风的甜言
还有些刺激的晕眩
你出现第一眼
故事 就开始发生不完
其实每一种爱情都差不多
渴望 失望 不停希望
我恨不得心中 只有你空间
浪漫 充满了我的天
算我俩天生有缘
不是一时新鲜
爱 你 显得很自然
sometimes... i really hope there is a guardian angel beside me... ... ... ...
coumtdown to the days im leaving Malaysia-4 Days
YYY
im lOving iiu .
1:03 AM
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
everyone may think that im someone that wont think for others but only care for my feeling. seriously, i really dunno im that kinda of person eu think of. ur everything has shown me how selfish am i. i too notice the changes in me, izzit a bad change or good change? i dunno. i hope is change for the better.
[11 November- Alone in the MRT having this thoughts]
i started to wonder,is ur 'miss eu' true to me? is ur 'worried for eu' true to me? Should i believe it using my whole heart? i dun wanna go back to the past me which will only listen to ur words only, i wanna trust and believe every words eu told me! but, for now, izzit possible? i dunno wad happen to me! The more eu hurts me, the more i love eu! Am i torturing myself? Or im just used to being hurts by eu?
[12 November - Bugis Library]
went there to do some researches for my assignment and waiting for mr pig to come n find me. den got to saw 'MEN ARE FROM MARS, WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS'. heart got itchy and went to grab the book n start reading it. inside there's a page cot my eyes;
She wants caring and he wants trust.
She wants understanding and he wants acceptance.
She wants respect and he wants appreciation.
She wants inclusion and he wants admiraton.
She wants validation and he wants acknowledgment.
She wants reassurance and he wants encouragement.
After my research, i went to meet mr pig in the MRT and he send me back home. In the MRT i was quite gan ga. cuss this few days i have been going to n fro alone. doing things by myself without him beside.can say got abit used to it le. den today he sudden came n wanna help me to take my bag, i insist on taking my own bag. den saw two empty seats, we both sat down together. Nv realy talk at all, sudden feel v strange oso. den i try to squeeze smth out to say. After awhile, he pull meto lie on his shoulder. At that moment i wanna back out, but dunno why, my body went weak n lie on his shoulder. at that moment, my tears nearly drop. it justs seems a hundred years since i have this feeling. the feeling was so strong. makes me so weak. so safe, sweet n secure in his shoulders. i love that feeling alotts. i long for that feeling! maybe thats wad we call when we lose smth den will treasure more when it comes back bahhs. On the way home, nothing much too. den went NTUC with Jian Liang n wei ming to buy just ingredients for cooking. was fun, i can say. not that kind of 'hao wan'. is because im with him! we seems to be back to normal again. =))
back home, Jian Liang send him in his bike, den i called my mom. got a big scolding from her, and i cried! wont mention wad happen. i can only say, she has NO TRUST in me!! cried in my room, den sudden a shadow came in.. ITS HIM!!!! i was surprised! my mind started to think, why is he here? isnt he left in Jian Liang's bike? how did he noe i need him at that time? he came into my bedroom, wipe my tears and push my head to lie on his shoulder again. i feel like his small princess at tat time. its the first time i cried in front of him, with him hugging me. although its sad for me but at the same time im glad n sweet!thankks!
I really wish the feeling will go on n on... dun wanna let this feeling stop anymore. this few days im really really miserable without eu! without ur care! without eu by my side! without eu in my sight!
At night eu msg me, got one sentence shock me, and my mind is wondering wad is that meaning? i dun wannause my thinking again. i wan eu to tell me. wad does it mean when eu say this ' i started to had the feeling of taking you for granted '.wad does this actually mean in u?
i hate it when ppl say i becos of boyfriend den leave friends alone! im not tat kind of person alrights! My boyfriend is also not that kind of person that will hold my freedom of not letting me go out with friends alright? When i say I cant means i really cant! Means i have smth on! And its true alrights!! Dun always take out the words ' i have boyfriend den dun wanna acc eu all' from ur mouth. please l0hhs! i dun see a need in this alright! i have my own schedule, he has his own schedule too! doesnt mean everyday cling together den shows we are in love or wad ok!
So wad if ur b'daee is on thursday! i dun give a damn too! cuss i just dislike talking to eu!!! Just Shoo!! i noe v clearly eu are not happy with me either. so dun act friendly with me too! thankks alotts.
Doesnt mean i say this den shows i dun wanna make friend with eu, but sometime, i really dun like to talk to eu. makes me really miserable by ur proud attitude! but of cos, if eu are able to change ur tone n reaction during talking, we can still chat al0tts! =))
Get giddy easily recently! headache too! Stomach still pain for me. wad siahhs.something wrong with my intestines i guess. NOT MENSTRUATION come ah! dun misunderstood ah. lOls. i feel my body is getting weaker and weaker by the days goes by. Maybe it is finding one day to faint. Lols. =D
why izzit everytime when the a guy do wrong things, the gal will forgive him? but if the same things happen to the gal, the guy would just leave er alone. why izzit when guys goes timer, most of the gals are willing to forgive their boyfriend? but wad if it happens to the gal, will the guy forgive? why izzit always the gal pleading their guys not to leave them, they still leave? but if its the other way round, wad will the guys do? and why?
Im not shooting any guy alrights. im just expressing my feelings towards this matter. it just seems unfair! if a guy slept with a woman, will her wife or galfriend forgive? mostly is yes, butif it happen to the gal?will the guys forgive? is there so many reason for a guy to slept with a woman? why izzit the gals that is more 'chi kui'? cant the guys just respects ur galfriend or wife that is around eu just like the gals did? Haiis! Noe why guys n gals are different in so many ways? cus men are from mars, gals are from venus!
i wrote this message to someone few days ago, wont mention names, names are protected due to some faulty reason. =x
[since eu noe doing that will make her angry n hurts den why in the first place still do it? Now den eu start to worried oso no use]
does everyone met this kind of problem before? so please respects n love n trust ur loves ones. eu may not noe how much eu would hurts ur loves one by ur minor words or action!
countdown to the days im leaving singapore - 6 days.
anyone wanna send me? lOls. Joking only lahhs. =))
YYY
im lOving iiu .
6:44 PM
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
[11 nov-in the library]
eu told me before, eu wont let me be alone throughout my journey anymore! eu told me before, from the day i have eu, eu wont let me be alone. no matter where i go, eu wont leave me alone but will stay by my side and accompany me unless you have urgent stuff. does this promise still goes on?
i told eu before, i have always been alone when im going out to do my stuff. so i dun mind to go out alone or wad. b4t eu gave me the 'ken din' that from that day onwards, ill no longer be going out alone, everywhere i go, eu would be there. eu still remember?
i just found out recently, your promise to me in the past is starting to fade away... ... ... ...
is it true that promise are meant to be broken?
i dun like the feeling when eu are holding a suspicious feeling towards me. the trust you have for me is fading too ... ... ...
can eu imagine how hurts am i? i kept reminding myself for not having negative thoughs. but the lonliness in me force me to think that way. where is the mr pig that will only gave me the best? where are eu? tears drop again!!! =(
YYY
im lOving iiu .
8:14 PM
Saturday, November 10, 2007
i got to hear this song ' Love Me' from ahh bann's blog. den got very very touched by the chorus. it said:
If you get there before I do,
don't give up on me.
I'll meet you when my chores are through,
I don't know how long I'llbe,
But I'm not gonna let you down,
Darlin' wait and see.
And between now and then,
till I see you again,
I'll be loving you, Love Me!
isnt it touched? Got a very very big de gan chu! hmms..
im at Jian Liang house with Xiao Wei, Ke Jing n Kelly. they were playing mahjong den im updating my blog plus selecting songs for them to listen. hehees. Dj for the day. lOls
I miss him. for the following day n so on.. wont be seeing him. on the 20th November, im going Malaysia too. for ONE WEEK!! really will miss him!!! i cant receive or send message at all. Gonna be hard. How are we going to go on this one week? somemore still need to rush my stupid assignment. humpt!
I Miss Him!!
YYY
im lOving iiu .
10:07 PM
你愿意牵着我的小手走无数的患难吗?你愿意陪伴这我一起面对无数的难题吗?你愿意跟我一起面对家人的反对吗?你愿意忍受我的任性吗?你不会后悔选择我吗?
我好想好想永远靠这你那威猛的肩膀！我好想好想永远做你值得疼爱的小公主！我好想好想永远依靠这你！
但是。。。我好怕！！！好怕我会太依赖你！好怕有一天你会觉得我很烦！好怕你会觉得我太小孩子脾气！好怕你看女生的样子！会让我觉得我不如她们！好怕有一天你会离开！好怕你不在我身边的日子！
我记得有句话说 [ 没有一个男人是值得你为他流泪的， 值得的，不会让你哭！] 虽然为你掉了很多眼泪，但是我很高兴我是为你而哭！担心你而哭，生气你而哭，伤害我的你而哭。不管掉多少泪，我还是一样那么的爱你！
我介意你说别的女生，我介意你说以前的女友，但是我愿意接受！我会把她们当做目标前进！也许你不知，你的话对我有多重要。也许你不知我们的每月对我有多重要，也许你不知我有多爱你，但是对我来说， 关于你的每一样的每一样对我都很重要！我在乎你的一切一切！再说一次<< 我爱你！>>
I love the feeling when eu call me 'darling' , 'laOopo', ah blur'.
Makes me feel im close to ur heart.
Makes me feel a part of eu.
Makes me feel im not alone.
Makes my heart sweet.
My smile will go up unknowingly too!
I Just Love eu alOtts laOogOng!
*Muackks*
YYY
im lOving iiu .
1:28 AM
i duno why sometime i really feel we are meant to be together. Whenever im down or wad, eu can feel it directly. In front of eu or at the back, if im hurts or wadeva, eu would feel it, although sometym i will tense to hide my stupid face to not let eu worry but deep in my heart, im really touched n surprised. it just seems so miracle! eu can see my hurts, why cant i?How cum i cant feel urs?I miss eu so much now! I wish to hear ur heartbeat now! Are eu willing to stay by my side till our hair become white? im looking forward to the day which we two will say " I DO! ".
Facing my mum everyday makes me feel so stress. everyday she would shoot me bout me having boyfriend. No matter wad things, she would blame me having boyfriend at this age. makes me feel like she is building a wall in between me n her. the more i wanna build rapport with her, the more her face is black. its really hard for me to face my mum. When can everything just STOP and turn back to normal? I need eu badly now!! Where are eu now? !! =((
YYY
im lOving iiu .
1:21 AM
Alone in the bus. Raining plus the cold air con. not feeling well at all. having flu, sore throat, stomach pain the whole day till now. In bus still got a headache. Makes me feel so cold n lonely. Trying to reach for ur hand. but eu are not beside me. In the past, eu once told me, if i were to ask eu to find me, even if there's no train anymore, eu would still come and find me. Would eu do the same now? my eyes is fill with tears now. I need eu badly by my side now!
Eu ask me y my face was black. Seriously saying, i dunno too! I just dun feel like talking. but seeing eu putting so much effort in FLP, makes me feel really proud of eu! Got so many time, i wanna tell eu, Eu Are The Best!
In office, i noe eu wanna buy those products that eu dun have, den i got to noe eu are lack of liquid soap, was thinking shud i offer my help? I think alOtt! I knew ur answer is dun wan! but i just feel like giving the last try. Hu noes ur answer is dun wan still! I can understand why eu say dun wan. But i just feel my kindness isnt appreciate.
Maybe eu do not noe, when eu are talking to me, ur tone is getting higher n higher by the days goes by. Eu seems to build a small wall in between as when as eu like. I really dunno wad eu wan from me.
Am i really not good enuff? is there any room for improvment? i feel so Shi Bai!!! Am i really the important person in ur heart? Am i really the one?Can eu really stand my moody side? Wad do eu actually sees in me?
I found out sometimes eu tense to find me irritating when eu chat with me on the fone. izzit true? Am i really that irritating to eu? Did i do anything wrong?
On the way home, so lonely! Walking near my house de car park! SO DARK!!! im so scared!! Got a car pass me, den i was like shivering, scared the car will sudden stop den pull me up. i nearly burst out with tears! Where were eu?
YYY
im lOving iiu .
1:02 AM
Friday, November 09, 2007
is there really trust in us? are we really able to hold hand in hand to walk past everything? everyone say Love is a possesion, wad about friendship? Does it mean if eu have a partners it will makes family drift apart from eu? i dunno!
I need eu real much now! I need eu!!
YYY
im lOving iiu .
12:26 PM
