Monday, August 27, 2007
SomehOw i gOt to nOe tat sOme things cant be shared!! And i dO agreed! Just like Friendship, Relationships and everything cant be shared at all!! Eu may say eu treat everyone the same, but did eu ever put urself in our shoes? Eu may find it normal and hate my thinking, but did tat happen to eu before? are eu able to sense our pain?
From ur mouth, there is only her name and everywhere eu go, eu would think of her, eu noe wad am i feeling? I noe we are just friends, but i just cant help thinking tat way.
SomehOw i dO feel sOrry for her, cuss it seems im the one breaking eu two up. eu think i lOve it? nO!!! i dun like it at all!! I feel more gulity!! I hope eu will ask urself seriously, hu is more impt to eu? Hu eu want to share ur sadness n happiness with? being a hamburger of eu two, im really miserable! I noe wad her feeling is, cuss i experience before! But did eu ever try to understand us? i noe to let eu choose, eu will find it miserable! I wont make eu miserable de, just make up ur choice, hu is the one eu wanna SHARE ur ups n downs with? and make it the ONLY ONE please! I dun wanna turn inside a circle anymore! Its hard for eu, me n her too! Eu can treat it as nothing happen, or maybe eu are trying hard to solve, but... ... ... please make up ur mind fast. thankks alOtts! [ dun ask me anything bout this part please! it will only opens my wound n fan nao! just figure out urself, as long as eu noe hu am i saying can le. ]
Tmr meeting with Yan Ping at 12pm is cancel le, we change it to 6pm. cuss all the other end school very late. and i just got to noe Xian Hao end school at 6pm too!!! Arghhs~ will he be coming? i dunnno! Hope sO lOhhs. I hOpe tmr's birthday will be unforgotten! Let's Smille!! =DD Birthday came !!! Happy Birthday To Me! Happy Birthday To Me! Happy Birthday To Me! happy Birthday To Me!
From ur mouth, there is only her name and everywhere eu go, eu would think of her, eu noe wad am i feeling? I noe we are just friends, but i just cant help thinking tat way.
SomehOw i dO feel sOrry for her, cuss it seems im the one breaking eu two up. eu think i lOve it? nO!!! i dun like it at all!! I feel more gulity!! I hope eu will ask urself seriously, hu is more impt to eu? Hu eu want to share ur sadness n happiness with? being a hamburger of eu two, im really miserable! I noe wad her feeling is, cuss i experience before! But did eu ever try to understand us? i noe to let eu choose, eu will find it miserable! I wont make eu miserable de, just make up ur choice, hu is the one eu wanna SHARE ur ups n downs with? and make it the ONLY ONE please! I dun wanna turn inside a circle anymore! Its hard for eu, me n her too! Eu can treat it as nothing happen, or maybe eu are trying hard to solve, but... ... ... please make up ur mind fast. thankks alOtts! [ dun ask me anything bout this part please! it will only opens my wound n fan nao! just figure out urself, as long as eu noe hu am i saying can le. ]
Tmr meeting with Yan Ping at 12pm is cancel le, we change it to 6pm. cuss all the other end school very late. and i just got to noe Xian Hao end school at 6pm too!!! Arghhs~ will he be coming? i dunnno! Hope sO lOhhs. I hOpe tmr's birthday will be unforgotten! Let's Smille!! =DD Birthday came !!! Happy Birthday To Me! Happy Birthday To Me! Happy Birthday To Me! happy Birthday To Me!
who will be the first 20 to wish me? hahaas. who will be in my blOg list TOP 20 lehhs? hehees. Check it out on my next post!! hohoOs. Will eu be the first? I will be counting from 12 am onwards... ... ... =))
Do eu noe sometimes ur laugh n smile can make ppl misunderstood? ur actions may let ppl misunderstood too. Ppl tat dunno eu, may say it, but i noe eu! I try to help eu to explain, but eu think by hearing those evil talks bout eu, i would feel better? i dun like it. They just dun understand eu! Maybe tat's eu, but sometime, i do feel something is wrong somewhere... ...
Im not that good as eu all think i am. I am not tat kind! I am not tat caring! I just dun like myself. Arghhs~ Wad am i talking about!! Just dun care bout me. Just Leave Me alOne fOr the time being please.
I just feel i cant communicate with eu all anymore... ... ...
The Presents I gOt frOm My Mama, The Rock n Wei Ming! Thankks Yar !! I Love It!! =D
The Ai Xin ' Cake' Wei Ming bake fOr me! Yummy!I called it "Ming Xin Love Pizza". =))
Arghhs~ I cant imagine my birthday can be celebrate until sO sO sO... ... UNFORGETABLE!!! Arghhs~ I just feel like shouting!!! 1157pm, my mama ask me to go downstairs saying my friend is downstairs waiting for me! I tot is Wei Ming at first, but think think think, cant be wad, he go home liaoos. Den was thinking issit Daymas, cuss he live one block behind me only. Den my mama kept smiling at me, say 'dunno lehhs' Den i got a feeling telling me is The Rock. The moment i went down.. hahaas. is The Rock! Lols. He gave me present n say HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Thankks!!! =D Den at 12am sharp, i suddenly received an sms from ahh bann saying she is very dOwn n need me by her side urgently, i inform my mama, and tell her i go n find ahh bann, i was very worried at first, run around my block n her block, but nv seen her AT ALL !! Got nervous, den tell my mama abt it, den she say maybe ahh bann bluffing eu lahhs. It makes sense, but i still continue finding, den when i run towards the fitness corner again. WOW!! I cant imagine it was him! issit really him?!! YES!! IT IS!! ITS HIM!! WEI MING!!! i am shOcked!! n tOuched at the same time plus worry for ahh bann! I was totally piss at first, cuss got to noe, ahh bann is FINE! but i saw the ai xin 'cake' Wei Ming bake for me, heart melt lahhs!! hohoOs. Im really tOuched!! tats all i can say! i dunno how to react at all!! He sings birthday song to me, although its not nice lahhs. hahaas. but i lOve it!! Den i make a wish ' I Hope everyOne around me will be HAPPY everyday!'. Blow my candle! hahaas. Den i dunno wad to do or say oso. kept asking him, when did he start to plan de! After his explaining, i was totally LOST of words. dunno wad to say. Den i just give him a Big hug n Thankks him personally. other den this, i really dunno wad to say, Just Thankks Thankks n Thankks!!! =DD n Bye! hohoOs. den went i go home, inside my lift, i saw his msg ' Would u hold my hand from tis minute onwards? Will u give me the chance to be ur boyfren? <3 ' den i decide not to dread n dun wan to lose this happiness tat is beside me all along le. I quick press 1st floor n go down find him. Den he ask me why i come down. I told him i saw his msg, He hold my hand, Den i told him ' I choose option 1 !'. the time is 12.17am. i rmb ehs!! =DD I can really sees from his face, he is really happy at tat moment! hahaas. i can see h0hhs. lalala... He ask if we can take pic together with the ai xin 'cake'. But i reject, cuss im untidy at tat time, with the home clothes n tat hairstyle. Eeeerrr... hahaas. He nv force me also, thannkks lahhs! =))
Went back home, i told my mama Wei Ming, Xiao Wei n Ah Ki celebrate with me. hahaas. cuss i cant be telling her only Wei Ming mahhs. Lols. Den she was shocked to nOe Wei Ming was here oso cuss he lives at Woodlands ehhs. hahaas. but think my mama oso noe wad happen between us lahhs. hahaas. My mum wish me too n gave me present. Its beautiful ehs! I Love it lOhhs!! its Starrs Braclet! wOot!! hahaas. Thankks Mum!! Im waiting for my dad's wishing. =DD
Tmr i am inviting Xiao Wei, Wei Ming, Jian Liang, Kok Soon n Kok Wah over to my house to eat eat eat!!! hahaas. AnyOne available tmr? Come please. The more the merrier right?! =DD Of Course!! LEE XIAO WEI, AHH BANN, LEFTIE, KELLY, CHOCOLATE MUST BE HERE ON TIME!!! SHE IS THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON IN MY LIFE!!! if she dare to late, den her pigu will be smaller den now. wahahahahhahahahas. =x
wOot!! My mOtOr License!! hahaas. Im Coming!! yeahhs Yeahhs~ =DD
I wanna spend my 18 th Birthday the happiest as ever n live everyday happily. All the sadness n Fan naO please shOoo! Eu are not WelcOme!! hohoOS. =x
Comes to thinking, today is really a special birthday for me ehs. Cuss there is NO ONE like Wei Ming laidat plan this whole things n makes me totally shOcked! I cant imagine it can happen to me, cuss i really long to happen like this before. i only tot it will happen in movie. But !! tOday it happens to me. he's the first guy to plan this special n shocking b'daee with 'cakes' for me. all i can is he is SPECIAL lahhs. <3
YYY
im lOving iiu .
11:10 PM
Sunday, August 26, 2007
Just saw my time table, Arghhs~ got to noe i need to hand in my IT project on this coming tuesday(28 August) n Marketing Project this coming Friday (31 August). But!!! I haven done it at all!! Arghhs~ Need to rush this week liaOos. nO chOice. Cant play play oso le, Exam coing in 2 weeks times. Oh man!!! Stress ah!!! All coming at once. all the subject i nv pay attention at all oso. Must study hard this coming 2 weeks liaoos. Hope sO!! God bless!!!
Actually I decide to hold a party on my birthday at my house. But discuss with my mama, den decide to cancel le. Haiis. As long as the person noe tat's my birthday and is willing to wish me, im oso very HAPPY le! =DD
Tuesday im meeting Yan Ping after my school ends at 12pm. Hope she wont late ah. tat time wait 1 hour for her ah. haiyOous!! Dunno she will be bringing hu too. if im not wrong, should be Wei Yan n Xiu Min lOhhs. I wanna call Xian hao n Jia Xian alOng lehhs. But they will come mahhs? This few weeks i rarely sees Jia Xian, he is working oso, will he be free? den Xian hao oso very hard to call him out de. Everytime say ' see first ' or ' dun wan '. This time will he say ' okaees '? Haiis. Comes to thinking, Xian Hao nv celebrate my birthday before ehs. HaiyOous. Nvm lahhs. nv blame eu oso. Lols. as long as eu wish me, is enuff le! =))
Tat day Wei Ming is having exam, ahh bann n ah Ki oso dunno free mahhs. wad if they needs to go down office lehhs? haiis. EveryOne is Just not free!!! aiyoOus. think liaOos oso heart pain. Lonely birthday again ah? Tink think think... ... I seems to nv really celebrate my birthday with my friends before ehs. like got cakes, candle, singing n foto shoot kind de. hohoOs. dunno this year birthday, wad will happen. Will all my friends remember? Will they wish me? I dunno! I jus hope 28 August will not come so fast... Wait till tat day come bahhs. Count down 2 days.. ..
wOot!!! Im gonna be 18 soon and my dad told me his birthday present for me is to sign up for motor course!!! wahaahaas. wait so long for tat day to come. last year i am so anxious siahhs. den go ask, but haiis. must wait till 18. den finally!!! hohoOs!! But sudden so fast, i oso anxious. like too fast laidat. Nervous lahhs. hahaas. think of future i will be riding a bike on the road. wahhs!! CoOl man!!! hahaas. Lols.
Today my mama ask me to call a fone number. hahaas. noe wad's tat? Im Mad siahhs!!! Lols. my mama tell me dun tell too many ppl first. so i wont mention here. hehees. heart itchy right? Lols. i just dun say. lalala. When time is ripe, i will say. Lols. Must be happy for me!!! =DD
My dad is back n off to work AGAIN !!! Arghhs~ Just seen him for 6 hours den he need to leave for Malaca for work le. Dunno when he will be back again. Just now see him leave, from his eyes i got sees his she bu de. AiyOous. Den awhile later, received his calls, he wanna buy my ARC Genesis album. But, tat stupid stOre nv sells. Im so glad tat he actually went to store to ask siahhs. Thankks dad!! =DD Thankks for ur support!! But i guess he buy for his friend de lahhs. Must promote me mahhs. hohoOs!! Lalala. =))
Head feeling giddy. Think Go bath first. Bye!!! Update again!! =DD
Take Care EveryOne. The weather is not tat good this few weeks. Really Must Take Care ah!! =)) Smilee mOre!!! I Love my friends tO SMILEE EVERYDAY !!! =DD
YYY
im lOving iiu .
10:17 PM
BeCause Im a Girl
And now I know that's the truth...
And although I tell myself, I'll never be tricked by love again
I still fall in love, and my heart is broken again
Please don't break the hearts of girls, who'll do anything for love...
I didn't know that living in this life while being loved would be so hard
[ Today we broke, you told me to meet someone better than you, and be happy...
You are just like all the other guys...
What happened to when you told me that you loved me?
Honestly, I don't want you to be happy
What am I going to do if you really forget about me
I'm in so much pain, more pain than i can bear
because I'm still in love with you ]
Please don't break the hearts of girls, who'll do anything for love...
I didn't know that living in this life while being loved would be so hard
[ There's someone i'm in love with
Although I can't be with her now...
I'm Still in Love with her now ... ]
Although I say I hate you now, I'll be missing you
Because i'm a girl, to whom love is everything
YYY
im lOving iiu .
2:53 AM
张靓颖 - 我们说好的
好吗 一句话就哽住了喉
城市 当背景的海市蜃楼
我们 像分隔成一整个宇宙
再见 都化作乌有
我们说好决不放开相互牵的手
可现实说过有爱还不够
走到分岔的路口
你向左我向右
我们都倔强地不曾回头
我们说好就算分开一样做朋友
时间说我们从此不可能再问候
人群中再次邂逅
你变得那么瘦
我还是沦陷在你的眼眸
我们说好一起老去 看细水常流
却将会成为别人的某某
又到分岔的路口
你向左我向右
我们都强忍着不曾回头
我们说好 下个永恒里面 再碰头
爱情会活在 当时光 节节败退后
下一次如果邂逅
你别再那么瘦
我想一直沦陷在你的眼眸
这是无可救药爱情的荒谬
YYY
im lOving iiu .
2:00 AM
The drawing he drawn for me. its really NICE!!
isn't it? =D Applause *
isn't it? =D Applause *
This few days alOtt of things did happen! Dun really wish to mention oso. I hope in future eu wont do anything to scare me n scare urself. Love urself more yar? Stand Up, Stand up for Singapore. =x
But i noe i did hurts him deeply le. all i can say is, Im really SORRY!! Other then SORRY i really cant find anything to say le. Thankks for the Love eu have given me previously. Im not the gal tat is worthy for eu to love too, maybe eu wouldnt noe, eu may find someone better den me in future yar? Dun always keep everything to urself yar? Rmb i did say, if one day eu feel like crying, give me a call? i may not be the best consoler, but i can be a very good listener too! Dun always think eu have no friends or no one cares for eu. Ur trusted friends n Me will always be here for eu! If one day, eu feel tat eu are falling, dun be afraid, i will be there to pull eu up yar?
Thankks for this drawing tat eu drawn for me. i rmb telling eu, in the past eu drawn two times for me but i throw away due to eu hu makes me really angry.after throwing, i did regret lahhs. cuss the picture is really nice indeed. but nv did i noe, eu would draw for me again. i admit, im touched! Thankks! Did i tel eu befOre? ur drawing is NICE! n its true!! Although it may looks simple, but its really very nice! =)) Rmb Our ice-Cream treat yar? call me up when eu are free kaees? i will be looking forward to tat day. =DD
Wont be blogging tat much. Cuss i oso dunno wad to add in. Another reason is lazy lahhs. hohoOs. =x
will try to update soon! =DD
YYY
im lOving iiu .
1:33 AM
Thursday, August 23, 2007
On 20 August, was a boring n lousy day for me alrights. I actually overslept in bus when I was on my way to school! Den I quickly get off the next bus stop and decide to head to school, den nv did I noe, when I just walk under the overhead bridge, the RAIN cames!! Its BIG alright!!! Wah lao!!! Decide to call Eric to ask if anyones has umbrella, but none have it. Arghhs~ Waited alone under the overbridge, can eu imagine only Me waiting for the rain to STOP! Lonely, I am so lonely! Hahaas. Somemore is under the overhead bridge ehs. aiyoOus. Lesson is boring too ehs. Haiis. After my lesson, went over to ahh bann hse and chit chat with her. Den fell asleep on her bed. Comfortable ehs. Hehees.
=D Night time Chit Chat with Wei Ming. Nothing special really happen actually, until he send me tat link. Its totally DISGUSTING I can say!!!! I damn angry at tat moment! Was thinking, why does he send me this disgusting link n let me see. But listen to his explanation, den found out, he actually dunno anything bout it, as he haven even view yet. Cuss his friend tell him tat link was POWER so he send me thinking shud be something good. Im just totally disgusted lahhs. Felt so dirty oso. At tat moment , my trust for him sudden FADE away. Was thinking of just ignore him for the rest of my life! In future dun listen or reply to his sms or calls anymore! Cuss I really really feel disgusted!
But the next day, 21 August, I still decide to find him! When school ends, I was thinking ‘why time so fast ah? Cannot slower mehhs?’ Den On my way to meet him, was still thinking of U-turn. But start to think, avoid is not a good solution. Face it is better too. But dunno why, after I seen him, all the thinkings I have, is GONE! I just feel very safe n secure feel him. Everything went smoothly too. Went to his house, actually was to company him study, but end up im using his com. Hehees.
After his studies, went Taman Jurong with him to meet up with ah gal. On the way to Taman Jurong with him, was FUN lahhs. Seen his “Siao” side of him! haahaas. Cannot tahan siahhs. lOls. When he’s high, is really HIGH alrights! Haahaa. Ahh bann! Eu met a competitor le! lOls! =D After tat meet up with ah gal liaoos we buy crab n lotts. Was Fun lahhs. Den KFC time. Jokes! lOls. On our way home, he needs to alight at Lakeside MRT station, seeing him alight, got a feeling of she bu de lahhs. Oso dunno why. Sadd to see him leave oso. Den was wanting to say ‘ bye bye’ to him, but he turn away n walk far le. Haiis.
Night-time. Chit Chat with him too! He needs to wake up 6am in the morning! Poor thing man! Asking him to sleep earlier, den he say he wanna ask me one last question den sleep. Our conversation goes on like this:
Me: Go Sleep lahhs
Him: I got one last qns
Me: Ask, quick! Den go sleep liaoos
Him: im confused bout our relationship now siahhs. Lol. Can say we look like we are together but if say together oso not together. Whats this relationship siahhs. So Messy!! Arghhs~
Me: I oso share the same thinking lehhs. Wahaahaa. Ask liaoos right. I oso answer liaoos. Go sleep! Go go go!
Him : Den eu choose lor… eu wan wad option 1) Lets be together 2) remain laidat. I choose 1 eh. Answer I jiu go sleep le.
Me: [No reply ]
Him: nvm I think eu oso dunno how answer. Need think first right.. haha I go offline lor. Later eu noe the answer le sms me bahhs.
In the end I oso nv sms him. first is im very sleepy le. Second is, I oso duno how to answer ehs. Lols. =D
Like I say before, sometimes I do love the feeling of being single. Sometimes I loves being love. I oso dunno wad I really want actually!
Haiis. Confused ah!!
tOday, 22 August, wake up at 9 plus den meet up with ahh bann to Outdoor of Science center to meet ah ki! We were having alOtts of FUN lOhhs. After playing awhile, den went Jurong East Entertainment meet up with Wei Ming, Den together, we eat LJS! Yummy!!! *saliva drop* =x
After LJS, went back to Science Center, this time, without ah ki again, cuss he need to go army, no choice oso, den ahh bann, Wei Ming n me went indoor to play l0hhs. Can say, its Mysterious, happy plus boring bahhs. lOls. I oso dunno how to say, think only, ahh bann, Wei Ming n me noe the feeling lahhs. I wanna mention here, Science Center is COLD alrights!! Next time go in must bring sweater ah! lOls. After all, its FUN!
Den bout 540pm, we actually wanna go down office de. But sudden cancel, den stay outdoor of Science Center lOhhs. We were all sitting down doing nothing, den I decide to go for a walk l0hhs. Wei Ming came along too! Den he sudden ask me, why nv reply his msg bout the option Ytd. lOls. Gan Ga ah!!
Seriously saying, today after eu ask tat question, got alOtt of times I wanna tell eu my answer is One! But I just dunno how to say! If I tell eu, my Love for eu is not as much as eu Love me, are eu still willing to go on? Wad if one day, when we are together, I started to change alOtt? I change till very unreasonable unknowingly and kept controlling eu. Change to a different type of KeXin. Arent eu afraid? I dunno! Wad I noe now is , I seriously need eu by my side alOtts alOtts!!!
Bout 6plus laidat, Wei Ming n I send ahh bann to bus stop, den BYE to her! Den off we go to Jurong East Interchange to take bus to Little India to find my mama! We actually overshoot the stop man!!! Den I started to get nervous le, dunno if my mama will scold mahhs. Den Wei Ming ask me to take cab there, den we dunno alight at which stop, den take cab there, after I reach Little India, I quick Quick say Bye n RUN to find my mama. So nervous siahhs. Den when I put down my bag, I quick quick run to Mrt station find Wei Ming, but think he left le, den I use washroom den go back to my mama workplace l0hhs. We were having FUN man!! Everyone was so high siahhs. Was singing lOudly n kissing n hugging each other. WoOt!!! Its FUN lahhs. If ahh bann is there sure Mad de l0hhs. Den my mama give me drink a sip of Martell. Eeeee. Its bitter alright!! Hahaas. Nv eat much oso. Im hungry now also! Going to drink milo liaoos.
YYY
im lOving iiu .
3:07 AM
Sunday, August 19, 2007
Sometime I really wish to share ur worries n sadness. But I just cant figure out why are eu still hiding things from me? Izzit im not mature enuff to share all this with eu? I noe all the answers eu gave me is fake, so I just keep quiet and trying to show I trust n believe eu. But ur actions tells eu dun trust me at all. Or eu just dun wan me to worry too much for eu? I have been waiting for eu to tell me the truth. But NO answer from eu at all. Mum! Please dun stress urself too much can?
Oh!!! HAPPY 18th BIRTHDAY TO SWEET AMANDA !!! haahaas. Its been so long since I sees her le. If next time got chance, we go drink milo kaees. hohoOs.
As for ahh bann. Hmms. Its quite sad tat im maybe the one to break eu two’s friendship. I have nothing to say too. But I hope wadeva decision eu make wont make eu regret for ur life. Sometimes giving in is not a bad things oso. She may not call eu, but eu can call her right? I noe eu scare dunno call her eu must say wad, but let me ask eu, when eu do invitation calling, did eu think tat much? Just pick up ur call and start talking, after awhile… eu two will be an auntie liaoos. Come on. Build ur friendship properly. If not how are eu going to go on? Losing one of ur love ones is like losing ur soul! Got it? I the past I may get jealous yar? Hahaas. I admit alrights!! Lols. But now, wont le!!! And I promise eu I wont too! So, dun be vex bout both of us the next time, cuss eu have given me ur promise tat no one can replaced me in ur heart, remember? Tat’s wad I believe n I trust tat eu wont bec0s of a friend den leave me al0ne yar? Just go on kaees? Pass the baton to me first. But dun walk too fast ah, must try to walk slower for me to catch up eh, I still need to pass eu the baton ehs. Lets Count on our FRIENDSHIP FOREVER !!!on n on n on… … … … … … =D
Well! Yesterday was a HAPPY plus Lousy day for me. Why happy lehhs? Haahaas. Cus I attend 1hour plus of my lesson only!! Lols. Den I went down to orchard to meet up with Xiao Wei, Wei Ming n Jian Liang! Starting xiaowei’s mood was lousy man! I see her lousy I oso lousy l0hhs. Very xing ku ah. I was trying to talk to her den hoping to see her smile… but NO!!! arghhs~ make me so xing ku! Fortunately, here comes ho ming’s call saying meeting change till 330pm den her smile is back! Den my heart was like PHEW~ FINALLY !!! haahaas. Ah wei ah!! Dun pull a black face ah! I very xing ku man. ah ki’s mood oso spoilt by eu ah. =D
After that we went Shaw House to have our lunch! Awhile later Jian Liang says he’s headache den needs to go home. But can really see is bec0s of xiao wei lahhs. Haiis. Shoudnt be laidat de. Tot its suppose to be a good mood for all of us. But end up laidat. But not bec0s of this den we mood swing lahhs. We do noe we dun bear to see him leave just like tat lahhs. After our lunch, went office l0hhs. On the way to office, Wei Ming’s face was black man!! its was BLACK ah!! I oso dunno wad happen to him either. So much wanted to console him, so much wanting to ask him why, but just dun dare. Just dun have the courage lahhs. So, I walk far far behind him l0hhs.
Reach office le. Den here comes Ho Ming, Wei ming n Ho Ming started to Chit Chat den of c0s xiao wei n I started to chit chat oso l0hhs. Den sudden a ‘F***’ word comes out from his mouth. Xiao Wei n I kena shock man!! Can sees that he is having a bad mood. Somehow feel lucky tat just now nv talk to him, if not dunno wad will happen to me lahhs. Well, I can only said im quite disappointed lahhs. Den I went out to take a walk l0hhs. Den sudden its strike my mind. I was thinking, is he all along cheating on me? Is he only trying to show me he is changing just in front of me, but when he is with his friend den it’s a different him. I dunno! I oso dun wish to noe!! I just noe I need to trust him! n I DO trust him!!!
After meeting with LiShao, went in Rex Hall for Success Day!!! Wow!!! Im damn HAPPY for Kok Wah man!!! Maybe bec0s seeing my good friend on stage bahhs. Got a feeling tat, Yes! He did it!!! Congrats!!! Full of Good luck for him too! And he really looks good tat day! Especially on stage!! Learn alott from the success manager’s testimonial. Really learn alott!! After the whole thing, went home in bus, den Kok Wah sat beside me n talks to me alotts alotts. Through out the whole journey, im busy listening to his lecture. Learn some things too. hohoOs!! =D
Night time had a long Chat with him. hehees. Im happy l0hhs. I noe im tired, but dunno why just dun wish to hang ehs. Still rmb him asking me:
Him: wad do eu treat me as? Boy-friend or Boyfriend?
Me: peng you l0hhs. Haahaas
Him: boy-friend or boyfriend?
Me: friend
Him: kaees. Give me an answer 1 or 2. 1 is boy-friend. 2 is boyfriend. When I say 1, eu just say yes or no, den I will noe the answer le.
Me: orh (smiling)
Him: One
Me: (smiling) =x
Him: izzit one?
Me: ehhs. 3!
Him: 3 is Hubby lehhs.
Me: (laughing) den 4 lehhs?
Him: Angel lover
Me: (laughing) den 5 lehhs?
Him: Hell Husband (laughing)
Me: (laughing) den 6 lehhs?
Him: All of the above
Me: (laughing) den 7 lehhs?
Him: 7 is None of the above.
Me: (laughing) 8 lehhs?
Him: No more Choices! haahaas
Me: haahaa. 9 ?
Him: I say no more choices right? haahaas
Me: Den wad about 10?
Him: Already say no choices liaoos. Dun understand English izzit? Den eu can go back to primary one liaoos! Haahaas =D
Me: (laughing all along)
Hey guys! When eu read this conversation, eu may find ‘him’ fierce! But hahaas, no ah! We are laughing and he is composing this 1-10 answer for me. All along.. its FUN lahhs!! hohoOs.
Den after that conversation with him, dunno wad we chat bout oso, den he sudden ask me go sleep, den I just listen l0hhs. When he was about to hang his fone, den I quick quick ask him back. The conversation goes like this: [ I think so lahhs. Cant really rmb. Cuss im still in a sleeping mode.HohoOs]
Him: Eu shud be tired le lahhs. Go Sleep! Go Go Go!
Me: Orhs (smiling)
Him: Good night!
Me: hmm!
Him: bye!
Me: ehhs.. err… … … just now that question h0hhs. My answer is 2! ( going to hang up quick quick but he sudden …)
Him: ehs!!
Den I cant rmb liaoos. Hahaas. Lols. Can say, im having a sweet dreams n sweet sleep l0hhs. hohoOs.
Today, wake up at 12pm. Waken up by Ah ki’s call. Calling me to get prepared quick as our meeting going to start soon when LiShao came. Meeting ends at 5 plus. Den rmb LiShao saying :
Dun because of ur sad past time den makes urself think there is no perfect in life n no perfect ending. Dun always think of the bad side when the things didn’t even happen. If eu kept thinking to the bad side, den it will eventually happens!
Wow!! Really gone into my mind man!!! Must remember by hard ah!! Its really knocks my mind man!! Lols.
Seriously saying, im thinking of him every now n then. I just dunno why I cant get eu out of my mind for a min! Aiyoous. Die lahhs. Hahaas. Comes to thinking, Sometimes in the morning when I go to school, I will hope to see eu below my house siahhs. But I noe it wont happen lahhs. Its just my side of thinking lahhs. But if really comes, think I oso dunno how to react, and I oso dun wish eu to do that alrights! =D
Wad can I say? I Just Miss eu lahhs!!!
Night time at xiao wei’s hse chatting bout the show ‘MISSING’. Its scary man!! I cannot imagine if one day Xiao Wei is MISSING from my life!! I cant imagine my life without her alrights!! Frankly saying, even now, im still very worried to let her go alone to office or anywhere! In my heart she is still the small gal tat needs me to guide her home. Hahaas. Xiao Wei!! Must really take care of urself lehhs!! I dun wanna see ur pictures around Singapore alrights? Even if its around Singpore, I hope its bec0s, eu have become a popular make-up artist or a Stars alrights! =D Smillee!!! I Love Eu lahhs!!!
YYY
im lOving iiu .
2:58 AM
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
Yesterday school ends at 12pm den went to meet up with Wei Ming for MOVIE at Somerset!! Hahaas. We went to watch ‘ Secret’ together. The show is damn NICE ah!! Touching n sad oso. Strongly Recommend alrights! Support Support!! =]]
After the movie, went esplanade roof top. The view is nice n beautiful ah. Den I kept seeing aeroplane. Not 1 plane only ah, is 15 plane. Hehees, My eyesight is POWER right!? Hahaas. After the outing with him went to my mama’s workplace for dinner at 8pm. Eeeee… the food not nice de lOhhs. But im full oso lahhs. =]] bout 920pm laidat went home with ahh boi alone.
Today went to school at 10 plus. Im just tired lahhs. Reach school oso nv pay attention cuss Eric n Jamie bring their laptop to school den we start to see ‘Crayon ShinChan’. Hahaas. Cute l0hhs. =]] Lesson ends at 12pm, den went down to Jurong East to meet up with Yan Ping, but I call her laOo Ping lahhs. hohoOs. Its been 3 months since I meet up with her siahhs. When meet up, we like two aunties talk so much n loud ah! Hahaas. Tell her alOtt of things oso. But Mostly is bout Love Life lahhs. After saying so much to her, she told me I actually love eu unknowingly. Cuss I will over concern for eu only and not others. I find it true too. Our chatting ends at 520pm. Den Bye Bye to each other. We plan to meet up next Tuesday too. Hope tat day come faster ah. =]] Miss her de l0hhs.
After meeting with LaOo Ping, went ahh bann hse to Chit Chat. Chat bout You, Me, Us, Them. Hahas. Just al0tt lahhs.
I tell her I have no faith in holding to a relationship for long. I have no confident in myself at all. But I noe I Do Love Him! Den She told me if we really get together, she will Zu Fu us. But den for our FLP, it will be messy for my line as my upline is Kok Wah! Understand wad I mean? As I say in my previous post, either one I chose I will be hurting one of eu too. I dun wan tat to happen at all. I just hate to see my friends hurts. For now, we are only concentrating al0tt bout love, den wad bout FLP? Wad if one day we are really together, den we started to quarrel or worst, break up, it will affect our line in FLP and life too. Are we wasting our time chatting and smsing each other ? or izzit only because we are just starting den have this kind of sweetness, den after a long while, all this will be gone slowly just like wad other couples do? Am I just getting use to receive ur Msg everyday? Are we really too young to start or its too early as we just got close this few weeks? Are we stable enuff? Do we really noe wad love is? Are we really true to each other?
I just feel our route is still very very long as in we still nid to go thru alotts alotts. I noe eu once said that eu wont wait for a person too long, say truly, after hearing, my heart started to ache. In the past if I hear it, I may find it normal, but now after hearing it, just seems like im losing eu sooner or later le… … … … I just feel like seeing eu now…
After the chatting with ahh bann den have dinner at her house follow by our singing session. FUN lohhs!! Hahaas. We kept singing non stop ah! Den we decide to sing again at her house tomorrow after my trip to VA to return my outfit. Douu & Bann dating tomorrow!!! Looking forward to it! Yeaps~
Oh No!! My project for ‘Economics’ is next Monday!! Arghhs!! I dunno h0w to dO at all l0hhs. Shit lahhs. I haven start doing oso. How to do man… why must have project lahhs… AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
As for eu, eu told me tat the person eu care and worry the most is me. The person eu love alotts is me. But eu shown nothing at all. Eu are only good at words. But ur actions nv tell anything at all. How can I believe eu? How do eu expect me to believe by ur white words? So please stop telling me all those mushy words. Im sick of hearing it too! Im sorry to say it until laidat, but please dun waste any more time on me le. Not worthy at all de!
Lastly, Dun Promise Me Anything Tat Its Not Done !!
YYY
im lOving iiu .
1:27 AM
Monday, August 13, 2007
Continue… … … …… … … … … …
As I say in my previous post :
[[sudden think of why are eu giving in to me so much when i dont! Yes! we did pr0mise each other that we must tell each other h0w we feel or think. and everytime i really tell eu without caring whether after eu hear h0w will eu feel. i cant imagine if its me h0w will i feel. i nv stand in ur sh0es to think at all! i dunno h0w much eu have been bearing ur pain.]]
Tats really how I feel. I really dun wish to hurts eu and making eu worry this and worry that. I oso admit sometimes I really find tat I love eu n I really need eu by my side, but sometimes I just feel like being alone. I noe waiting for a person is very miserable because I experience this before. Sometime I really wish to just tell eu ‘Stop waiting for me’. Its not that im rejecting eu or wad. Is I noe its miserable waiting for a person. Yes, I did say after I overcome come my past den its our beginning, but I feel tat im just trying to run away from this problem. I noe very clearly I have overcome my past, but whenever I feel like touching LOVE, I will back out. I dunno why too. Maybe eu are right in saying time will tell everything bahhs. Haiis. Wad can I sae lehhs. Eu can really affect me by ur bad n good days man. Seeing eu happy, im happy too, seeing eu emo, I oso emo liaoos..
This 3 days really v lazy to bl0gg lahhs. Also g0t al0tt of things happen. On last Friday, after school meet up with ahh bann for lunch. When I was buying our lunch, den saw Wei Ming beside me. I was damn shock at first den g0t nerv0us oso. Sudden ask myself ’ Am I dreaming?’ hahaas. Really shock me lOhhs. Shock until order the wrong food ah! Hahaas. I noe im careless lahhs. lOls. After the lunch, Wei Ming n ahh ban came my hse to watch ‘nan er ben se’. follow by Kok Wah!
Watch half way, my sister sudden go out without telling us where she go. Just PONG! The door close! I admit im worried but just dun wanna show out, so just maintain as its none of my business lOhhs. After the show, we went over to ahh bann’s hse den down to fitness corner to chit chat n play AGAIN! Hahaas. Den sudden ahh gal came down from ahh bann’s hse and tell me tat my mama call him saying my sister sudden call her and started crying n saying she dunwan to go home! I was really shock n worry l0hhs. I have no mood to continue playing so went home straight and start to search for my sister’s friend phone number and start calling. But just cant reach her friends n her l0hhs!! Really very worried!! Den g0t no choice, I call my mama and ask her wad actually happen. My mama just push the blame on me. I really dunno wad wrong did I do man! Den I start to get more n more worry, den alone staying in the room started to fan xin! Sudden Wei Ming came in and talk me round. I really dun have the mood to talk to him, so was kinda of keeping quiet n hmmm… ahh… orhh… after tat he ask me if he should leave the room and letting me alone thinking. Den I say yahhs. After he went out, the next moment he came IN again!!! I was so so touched n … … cuss at tat moment I really nid him beside me alotts alotts. I so much wanted to lend his shoulder but just…
haiis. Its quite sad losing a sister l0hhs. Den ahh bann, Wei ming n ahh gal help me to find her from BOON LAY TO JURONG EAST CANAL!! Not by taking bus alrights! Is by WALKING!! My leg gonna break man. Especially Wei Ming’s foot! His shoes is torn den bare foot walking l0hhs. Quite xin tong lahhs. Den was thinking, thanks him n ahh bann for being with me when I really need them around!! But im more worry for my sister l0hhs. We just cant find her lahhs. Den l0ng story lahhs. Lazy to write oso. Ahh bann g0t scolded, Wei Ming g0t scolded, den went Jurong West to find my sister’s friend with Ah Ki. THANNKS XIAO WEI, WEI MING n JIAN LIANG for being with me till the end when I really need ur help!! Thankks al0tts lahhs. =D Den not l0ng, received a call from mama saying my sister is with her, den we was like ‘WAHHS!!!!’ dunno how to say oso, but at least we can fang xin le l0hhs. Reach home, my mama ask us wad actually goes on at home? Why is my sister so hate to stay at home. Den quarrel with my sister really seriously l0hhs. Den oso l0ng story lahhs. I can only say Its quite angry n hurtful l0hhs!!
Yesterday was ALBUM LAUNHING DAY!! Hahas. Excited n high l0hhs!! I was so high man. den was madd ah. But thanks to the make up artist for making me looks pretty tat day! Thanks YAN YI !! Overall feel very excited n happy plus abit of disappointed n guilty l0hhs. Cuss call all my friends here den in the end I nv sing at all. But im glad tat Xiao Wei, Wei Ming, Li Shao, Ju Yee, Mrs Neo, Mama, Keris n Eric to buy my album! Thankks f0r supporting! Let me give eu all a BIG huggs! *huggies* =D
After the event, take bus to Jurong Point with Cliff, Kok Wah, Kok Soon n ahh gal, Kok Wah sat beside me kept talking craps. Quite boring n sick lahhs. Hahaas. But tats him lahhs. If he nv talk craps den will find it weird lehhs. Lols. But can stop say ‘ I Love You’ to me mahhs? Seems fake n sick lehhs. Den I was like trying to entertain eu. Haiis. Reach Jurong Point den eat Pizza Hut. Hehees. Loves~ hohoOs. Den sudden Kok Wah call his friend den something serious crop up man! I noe he is hurts n sad, so over here wanna tell him dun be too sadd over it. Cuss no matter wad, we are still ur friends. We will stand by eu de. If eu feel like crying just cry, no need to force urself n hide ur sadness too kaees. Smille! =))
After the whole things, went home, bathe, chit chat online till 3plus in the morning. Den chit chat on fone with Wei Ming till this morning 7plus!! Hahaas. We are breaking our record man!! hahaas. Den went to sleep till this morning 11 plus while Wei Ming went to play Basketball with his friends. 11 plus wake up den start doing housework, TIRED man!! hahaas. After doing housework den start listening to our album. hohoOs. ITS NICE ALRIGHTS!! Hahaas. Not becos im singing in the album so I say its nice alrights, but its really nice lahhs. My dad still tease me saying ‘ wahhs, how cum I have a feeling tat im a star dad now!’ haas. Cute l0hhs my dad!! He just came back awhile n off to M’sia again le! Take Care on ur way kaees!! Misses!! =))
Hehees. Stop here le. Think some problem with my computer, cant login to my blog de. So over here THANKKS WEI MING for helping me to post ! Thankks ah!! Next time treat eu drink plain water. Wahahahahhahahahahhas!!!! Smillee
YYY
im lOving iiu .
1:12 AM
Sunday, August 12, 2007
Its Me..Kexin.. ahh xin 
Evidence of red mark
ahh xinn and ahh mingg
leon and me
the artist
Yismin and meYYY
im lOving iiu .
1:24 AM
Friday, August 10, 2007
Hi everyone! im in school now! haiis. no lesson going on den g0t time to bl0g l0hhs. HAPPY BELATED NATIONAL DAY!! hahaas. Went to playground with ahh bann, ah ki, kok wah n my siblings to celebrate our very first national day together. hahaas. FUN lohhs. playing blind mice, ice and water and jian dao, shi tou, bu! hahaas.
haiis. yesterday chit chat with xian hao, kok wah den wei ming. sleep at 3 plus last night thinking alOtt of things.
for xian hao lehhs. chit chat n0t al0tt lahhs. we are just staying in the same t0pic kept hmm.. ahh.. orhh.. l0hhs. He using his f0ne to call me den i so w0rry his hi-card money will be empty siahhs. cuss few months back, i need to find him really urgently den cant find him l0hhs. really scared ah. den when i tell him to hang up quick as i worried for his hi-card den he say maybe after hanging den no more chance to talk le. wahhs. i so so so scared man!!! dunno why he says tat too. so worry!!! Xian Hao!! Please dun scared me alrights? im really wOrry f0r eu alrights?
As for wad Kok Wah say to me, can say im really touched bahhs. but oso bringing abit of no trust for him. no choice lahhs. my mama teach me dun believe or trust anybody easily especially GUYS!! but i really g0t listen every w0rds eu tell me lahhs.
den wei ming lehhs. only chat 30mins with him niahhs. Dunno why talk to him no mood oso. maybe is becus i tell him bout Kok Wah bahhs. I can really sense eu are changing for me, and i noe its hard for eu too! but dunno why yesterday sudden think of why are eu giving in to me so much when i dont! Yes! we did pr0mise each other that we must tell each other h0w we feel or think. and everytime i really tell eu without caring whether after eu hear h0w will eu feel. i cant imagine if its me h0w will i feel. i nv stand in ur sh0es to think at all! i dunno h0w much eu have been bearing ur pain. if it was me, i think i will beng kui le! can eu dunn treat me so good? can eu dun care so much for me? i noe im stubborn n selfish! please dun treat me so good! i really hate myself for n0t thinking f0r eu while eu are the one tat kept thinking and caring bout me. but wad did i do in the end?!! NONE AT ALL!!! Arghhs!!!
Standing in between eu two. i have a sense of.... ... dunno h0w to say too. i really dun wish to lose the two of eu! i noe my decision will hurts one of eu. but i dun wan tat!! i really dun wish tat to happen! dOes it mean if there is no love in between den we will not meet often? we will not play together? we will not go outing together?
for the time being write till here bahhs. go home den continue.
to be continue ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...
YYY
im lOving iiu .
10:43 AM
Saturday, August 04, 2007
On 2 Aug, its Thursday, No school for me! hehees. good yar? lOls. Den went down to office with xiao wei. Meeting with Li Shao till halfway, den my eyes n ears are in on-off mode le. Just feel very sleepy lOhhs. When he change his topic to 'Invitation', my eyes n ears open damn BIG. Full of energy n Confident ahs. hahaas. After the whole meeting, went home with Cliff and xiao wei ay 7 plus. Nv went home actually, went xiao wei hse to do 'Invitation'. Jian Liang n Kok Wah come along toO! It was fun and i got abit of skills bout the 'invitation' le. After the whole thing. we decided to stay at Xiao wei's house to watch horror movie. but sad to say, my mum just DUN ALLOW !
Yesterday, 3 Aug, After school, got case den go down Clarke Quay lOhhs. After the case went home alone, bath and MSN! hahaas. Chit Chat with quite a number of people! Surprisingly, I manage to Chat with Gee Soon. Goodness! Im damn happy man! I dunno how to say how happy am i. Im Just really happy by our conversation. From our conversation I can sense that he has become a more talkative person le. hahaas. im not saying he's talktative ah. just this time round got more words and expression le! =D Sat truely, I do MISS him alOtts!! I ask if I can call him out to drink Kopi, and he say CAN!! Wow!!! I fly to the moon ah! hahaas. Den not lOng, Xiao Wei called and ask me to go down and meet ahki, Cliff and her for dinner Quickly! And really Quickly! Say truely, i wish to chat more with him, but hearing Xiao wei asking me to go down quickly, i sense that she is very hungry, so i quickly run down. And asking if possible Gee Soon will wait for me to come back and continue our conversation. But!! when i go down, I NV NV NV noe, Xiao wei still need to go her house and change! Arghhs!!! I was like mad. Hao bu rong yi manage to chat so much with him, den was lyk damage by xiao wei. I noe it's not her fault! I noe I cant blame her too! but i really really blame and blaming and blaming myself!!! Im truely not angry with her at all! im just too emotional le! The whole journey and supper was like very uneasy because of me. Im sorry bout tat! But eu just wont understand my feeling de lahhs. Eu dunno how much i miss him. Eu dunno how long I have wanted to talk with him. Even his simple "HI" can make my day bright!! But of cOz, at tat very moment, something strike my mind! I have promise someone i will overcome my past. Wad can i say is, I really need time!! I know i have usen 3 and a half years overcoming it! But... haiis... How can i overcome it? How can i totally forget him? How can i stop hearing his news and wont get excited? Its really hard on me seriously. Haiis..
After my so called dinner with kok wah, xiao wei, Cliff and ah ki, Kok Wah ask me to go aside and sit. Cuss he wanna talk to me personally. Den of cOz xiao wei, Cliff and ah ki go home first. Kok Wah talk to me alott! It's really alOtt!! He told me his feeling and future. We just chat with each other openly. I really feel happy for you. cus you know how to think of your future and sure wad ur goal is. Chat not long, on the way home, suddenly received a call from my sister saying Boi Boi fight with my mama! Den i was like kena shock! But really Thankks Kok Wah for riding me home so fast and so safely. Thankks alotts!
I reach home really fast! Wad really happen, I wont mention here! n i wont say anything le!!! I noe its my fault for making eu all worried bout me! but can eu imagine how beng kui and how much i nid eu by my side? Eu tell me if anything happens to me, eu wanna be the first to noe. i really tell eu at first!! But i nv noe tat eu will get so worry for me!! ARGHHHHS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Its all my fault!!!! I shouldnt have tell eu firstly!! Im really stupid to tell eu n making eu so worry for me!!! Im Sorry for bullying eu!!Im Sorry for making eu Cry!!! Im sorry for making eu so worry for me!!! Im sorry for making eu angry!!! Im Just SORRY!!!! Its all my fault!!!! PLEASE DUN FORGIVE ME!!!! Makes me the BAD PERSON in the world!!! I will Sincerely accept this name eu gave me!!! I really nv tell my brother to bluff eu all im not around since morning!! i just tell him to tell eu all im not free! I dun think i will be going out and play basketball with eu all anymore le! Yesterday is a disaster for me!! Do eu think i still have the time to think bout eu all? Eu say sorry cant solve anything!! Yahhs! its true!! but other den sorry i really have nothing to say le! XIAO WEI!!! IM SORRY!!!
YYY
im lOving iiu .
9:21 PM
Thursday, August 02, 2007
Yesterday went to school just for 10 min. wahahaas. cus i purposely go late de. no choice! the teacher's lesson is damn boring! wahahas. den my friend say ' might as well dun come' den i tell them ' come school see eu all de mahhs' wahahaas. Arghhs! Marvin called me KLK! wahahahas. He's funny lOhhs. cannot laidat call me lahhs. hohoOs. after the 10 min lesson, went bugis national library to meet up with wei ming to do project. Thankks for ur company yar? =)) After the research of project den go VA for meeting, poor wei ming nid to waste his time waiting 1 hour for me. so sorry bout tat. but THANKKS! Den on the way home, xiao wei called to ask us to go for Basketball! Yeahhs~ Reach boon lay den have dinner with ah gal, wei ming n kok wah! Den comes xiao wei, after that basketball time! woOt!!! they are very serious in playing basketball man! Cool ah! HandsOme too ehs! hohoOs! Den dunno wad happen to wei ming oso. sudden no mood. den when i finally noe, we solve it together, and now we are BACK TO NORMAL le! hohOos. isnt it great? CheerS! hahaas. below are the pix we taken at basketball court. looks stupid but nice lehhs. hohoOs! Can see Kok Wah is vexed yesterday, but nvm, everything will be finee the next day yar? Smile! =D
Saw weiming's face? Funny right! wahahahas. i see once will laugh once ah! being bullied by my 2 brothers den his face crack until so jialat. poor thing ah! wahahahahs. =x
My mum decide to celebrate my sister's birthday on saturday or sunday. We will be eating Pizza and CAKE !!! WOW!!! hahaas. XIAO WEI, AH KI, WEI MING, eu all are invited to come too!! Come and celebrate the FUN with us again!! Wahhs!! Looking forward to that day man!! its gonna be fun!! take lOtsa pix too! wahahahas.Tomorrow nO school! Yeahhs~ but nid tO go down office at 1 plus den 5pm or 6pm come back to xiao wei hse and do yao yue with kok wah thay all! hope wont be too stressfull for me tomorrow! gOd bless!!
YYY
im lOving iiu .
12:21 AM
